FedEx Ground Sucks, Day 8

No delivery and no updates to the FedEx tracking page, so I called again. This time they put me through to some dude in Pittsburg. He calls the local delivery center place and then explains to me that my package is amongst several thousand other packages (maybe a pile of shipment exceptions?) and that they have not yet been able to locate it. Hurray. I explain that I am leaving on Friday morning and that I need this package before then, and that I thought a delivery date of a week in advance was plenty sufficient. He agrees and suggests that I talk to the manager at that location. He transfers me and I get the voicemail of someone named Deborah. I left my name/number/tracking-number/etc., but haven't heard back yet. Grrr.